So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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