So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I have aggressive nipples.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
