Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
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