Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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