Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
