in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
