If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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