Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Will you blow on my dice?
it wasn't lemon gatorade
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
