just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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