I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
