Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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