in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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