Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
