Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
