Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Randomize
