she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
