i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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