Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
