maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Just high enough for therapy.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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