dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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