You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
