$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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