He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
