we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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