she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
