You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
