your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
do herpes really smell.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
