You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
kristin has been a bad kristin
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
