You can't special order awesome
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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