help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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