Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
