Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
