pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Someone signed my nipple.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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