dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Randomize
