I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
