Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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