after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
