"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
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