I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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