Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
i need to put some appletini on your dick
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
