Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
