i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I've blown a few things in my day
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
