those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
