help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
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