i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
