It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
It's shark week go big or go home
Randomize
