she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
