i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
