I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
PANTIES FOUND
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