So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I have post one night stand depression
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
